Crawl Space

March 10, 2008 @ 12:01 am · Filed under Flash fiction, Original fiction, Sarah Hilary

  • By: Sarah Hilary
  • Word count: 100

I’m alive, thank god, I’m alive.

I thought he’d kill me; those black eyes boiling over in his face. I fought then ran for cover, frantic, unthinking.

Under the house.

I dragged myself down, scrabbling and tunneling, digging my own grave.

A low oblong of light is all I have left. I see the toes of his boots rusted with my blood. My throat’s a fist, fighting dry dirt. I’m trapped, my shirt snagged on tacks, my skin hostage to a hundred splinters. He’s got a hammer, and boards, is shutting out the light.

I’m alive, oh god, I’m alive.

23 Comments »

  1. Peter C Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 5:55 am

    Big Shudder.

    ‘his boots rusted with my blood’ -great

    Pete

  2. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 6:39 am

    Thanks, Peter, it’s great you liked it so much.

    Sarah

  3. Avis Hickman-Gibb Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 7:17 am

    Tight writing. a huge story told in 100. And so nasty. Well done Sarah

  4. Oonah V Joslin Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 7:25 am

    Very disturbing. Well written.

  5. Anne-Elisabeth Moutet Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 7:35 am

    Terrifying story, leaves you disturbed and haunted for a long time, all this in 100 words. The horror, the horror.

  6. Bill West Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 7:39 am

    Great horror packed drabble.
    Powerful twist.
    Well done Sarah.

  7. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 8:17 am

    Thanks, Avis, Oonah, Anne-Elisabeth and Bill. I really appreciate the positive feedback.

  8. Mark Dalligan Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 8:29 am

    Haunting, with its oppressive atmosphere and steep slide from being grateful to be alive to the opposite.

    Cheers

    Mark

  9. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 8:38 am

    Thanks, Mark. So glad you got that book-ending of emotions! The first editor who looked at this missed the point entirely. Luckily, Megan here at Shred… was on it like a shot!

    Sarah

  10. Kevin Shamel Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 10:04 am

    Yikes.

    Nicely done, Sarah. Short, concise, scary as hell. Don’t we WANT to be alive? Apparently, no.

  11. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 11:06 am

    Thanks, Steve. I guess there are circumstances when life seems left attractive than other options.

  12. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 11:48 am

    Or even LESS attractive! Sorry for the typo.

  13. Raflesya Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 2:28 pm

    It took only 100 words of yours to make me feel horribly claustrophobic! You should put a warning on your fiction: ” It can raise powerful emotions”!
    Brilliant!

  14. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 10, 2008 @ 2:33 pm

    Thank you, Raflesya! I will try to remember the warnings in future.

  15. gaydegani Said,

    March 11, 2008 @ 8:54 am

    Took the risk today because even when I googled this site, it proclaimed danger…but not as much danger as the woman in your story. Brilliant. Excellent, Sarah. And scary as shit.

  16. gaydegani Said,

    March 11, 2008 @ 8:55 am

    Sorry about that four letter word. It’s how I felt.

  17. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 12, 2008 @ 3:23 am

    Thanks, Gay! And - yes - I’m chuffed you liked it so much.

  18. Lima Said,

    March 19, 2008 @ 4:59 am

    Scared the hell out of me in that really good, want to read it again kind of way. Fabulous.

  19. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 24, 2008 @ 9:08 am

    Thanks, Lima! Glad I scared you. *g*

  20. Tobi Schultz Said,

    March 27, 2008 @ 3:50 pm

    I’m not normally a fan of flash, but that was very good. Very tight.

  21. Sarah Hilary Said,

    March 28, 2008 @ 4:32 am

    Thanks, Tobi, I appreciate that.

  22. Patricia J. Hale Said,

    April 5, 2008 @ 8:26 am

    Nice job.

  23. Sarah Hilary Said,

    April 14, 2008 @ 5:42 am

    Many thanks, Patricia

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